This is a piece that came through to me a few years ago while in flow and not thinking what I was writing. It comes from a deeply connected place. In fact, I hadn’t re-read it since I wrote it and put it away in a notebook, hidden in the back of a drawer until I found it this week. It feels the right time to share. It may or may not resonate with you. I’ve typed it as accurately as I can from its raw, written form.
When do we learn to care more for the needs of others, than to care for our own needs?
When do we learn the word selfish, and why are we not taught the words self-love or self-care?
When do we switch off the signal that allows us to receive?
Is that when we learn?
When we allow our inner voice to be dulled, drowned out by the voices of all those who see our light, and choose to dim it so that they can feel ‘more’?
More what? More equal? More than?
When we allow our inner voice, our internal guidance to the best of us, our best life, to be dimmed, we become a paler version of ourselves.
It may make it easier for you to fit in, at least for some period of time, to feel like you belong, but if you are not allowing yourself to hear your own voice, your truth then you are not being your best self.
Does it matter? Well, does it?
Only you can know if it matters to you. If you feel comfortable in your own skin. Not defined by the external approbation of others, whose voices drown out your own. Sometimes they are hearing you, sometimes they are not. Sometimes, after a while they are quietly stifling you, quietly making you doubt.
Doubt whether you are right when they criticise but mean well. Just for your benefit, you understand. To help you get perspective.
To see it from their point of view. Y’know. Outside of you. Not actually seeing you. But seeing the version of you that exists, like a hologram, as a projection of what everyone else needs to you be.
Then do you hear your inner voice? Quietly, it whispers to you. Is that true? Is that you? Are you what ‘they’ say? You listen to them and the projection expands, layer upon layer.
Until one day, the inner voice, that once quiet voice shouts loudly enough…
‘Hello, this is me. You, your truth here.’
That’s when it begins.
The quiet knowing. The quiet hearing. The quiet voice that you now listen to. Just now and then.
This. This is the beginning.
The beginning of your journey.
The journey back to yourself.
To your beauty, your magnificence, your completeness, your whole, your truth.
You, in all that you are and ever were.
Back home to your heart. Your love. Your love of self.
Herein lies all wisdom, peace and joy.
You.
Go shine your light.